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22 October 2020 | Story Emma Morape | Photo Supplied
Emma Morape, who battled with low self-esteem, anxiety, and depression, believes it is important to love and be kind to yourself. She urges others to remember that they are loved and appreciated.

I am Emerentia Morape, mostly known as Emma. I am 21 years old, and for as long as I can remember, I have been battling with low self-esteem, anxiety, and depression. Since Grade 7, I have had problems with my identity, body, and attempting suicide. I have spent years overdosing on pills and trying other methods to kill myself. In the darkest years of my life, I resorted to drugs and alcohol to cope with the pressures of varsity, family, wrong friendships, body changes, and getting into toxic relationships.

However, those dark years did have some light at the end of the tunnel, and that light was the very good friends that I made when I arrived on campus. For the first time in my life, I could open up to people about the pain and struggles that I am going through without feeling judged, and they advised me to see a psychologist to get professional help. So, I went to Student Counselling and Development, talked to a psychologist, and started feeling better. The only problem was that I thought depression was something that could be fixed quickly by talking to someone and then life goes back to normal. So, as quickly as I got better, I ended up in a darker depressive hole. 

I then started seeing Dr Melissa Barnaschone at Student Counselling and Development and attended well-being workshops. I attended the Self-Esteem Programme, the GROW programme, and the REBT Programme, which helped me deal with my anger. Lize Wolmarans, also from Student Counselling and Development, really helped a lot with the GROW and Self-Esteem programmes.

I was in a safe environment where I could have my own opinion and could curse and cry as much as I wanted to. I keep the book and notes from the workshops with me for when I go through horrible episodes of anxiety, self-acceptance, and those ‘I do not want to see or talk to anyone’ days; it really helps me to get back into perspective and give me a sense of hope for the future. Being able to talk to Dr Barnaschone and my lecturer, Dr Visser, about anything that I experience – personal or professional – and being able to ask for guidance and not feel judged, has been the greatest help this year, including the struggles of the pandemic.

I am also a rapper and songwriter; so, through Dr Barnaschone, I have been able to go back to my passion and write songs about my depression and growth. It has allowed me to be a better version of myself. I have been able to record and perform these songs and use them as a tool on my journey of peace.

Hope, to me, means peace through the storm, because hope does not mean that everything is perfect; it is keeping the faith when you are walking through the fire and believing that you will make it to the end. On your journey to find yourself and peace, you will be victorious. I remain hopeful, because every time I look back on my life thinking of the pain and heartache I went through, I find a glimmer of hope knowing that I have been through hell and still made it out; so, I can conquer whatever struggles come my way.

My message to the UFS community and humanity is to allow yourself to be vulnerable and feel every emotion and pain you experience. The grass is always greener on the other side, so do not be shy or scared to speak out and get help. Talk to trusted friends and family about anything that you are experiencing and is overwhelming you, even if it is just to vent. 

Talk to a psychologist or social worker, attend as many mental-health workshops as you can, read about mental health. Even though it is not something you are experiencing personally, you might be able to help someone close to you and save a life. And remember to live a healthy, balanced life, meditate as much as you can, spend time with yourself.

Most importantly, love and be kind to yourself! Remember that you are loved and appreciated, even by people that you do not know; so, keep your head up and spread light, love, and positivity.

News Archive

Top PhD graduates hailed for excellent research in development and historical studies
2017-07-11

 Description: Top PhD graduates hailed for excellent research  Tags: Top PhD graduates hailed for excellent research  

Prof Melanie Walker and Prof Ian Phimister

The Centre for Research on Higher Education and Development and the International Studies Group celebrated its PhD graduates on 26 June 2017. The four graduates were joined by their PhD promoters Prof Ian Phimister and Prof Melanie Walker, the Dean of the Faculty of Economic and Management Sciences, and their families, who came from far and wide, as well as various faculty academics and staff. Their areas of study ranged between Development Studies and Africa Studies, exploring issues that make a significant impact on the Southern African region and the continent as a whole.

In the Faculty of Economic and Management Sciences, specialising in Development Studies, Dr Faith Mkwananzi, promoted by Prof Merridy Wilson-Strydom, explored the lives and educational aspirations of marginalised migrant youth, a case study in Johannesburg. She focused on the complex nature of the daily lives and experiences of marginalised migrant youth and the complexities that influence the formation and achievement of educational aspirations in contexts of vulnerability and disadvantage. The study provides compelling evidence for policy and practice that can make the lives of marginalised young migrants better.

A focus on teaching and learning in Zimbabwean universities with a focus on quality as a human development, was what Dr Patience Mukwambo, put her research efforts into. Her work makes an original contribution to national, continental, and international debates on conceptualising and operationalising the quality of teaching and learning in higher education. She successfully developed a significant alternative approach to understanding what quality in higher education teaching and learning entails, the factors that influence the realisation of quality as she theorises it, and the overall importance for human development and human well-being in universities and society.

Dr Bothwell Manyonga, who also specialised in Development Studies, examined the broader debates on the purposes and practices of teaching and learning in higher education with a case study at two South African universities, with an emphasis on principles of social justice and equity. In the thesis, he developed a model that proposes grounds for (re)thinking sociology teaching and learning to address how the capabilities approach and dominant human capital theory might complement each other in higher education and curriculum development. This takes into account both the instrumental aim of employment, which is of concern to students, as well as the intrinsic goods of critical discourse and personal development.

In the Faculty of the Humanities, with a specialisation in Africa Studies, Dr Abraham Mlombo’s doctoral research explored the relationship between Southern Rhodesia and South Africa 1923-1953, examining the ‘special relationship’ between the two countries from the former’s perspective, highlighting the complexity of the ties between them by examining (high) political relations, economic links and social and cultural ties. “It is through Abraham’s research that for the first time, black experiences of both sides of the colonial border are detailed,” said Prof Phimister.

In congratulating the graduates, Prof Melanie Walker expressed that a lot of hard work was put into training the PhD candidates and they had without a doubt produced work that was of the highest level, at international standards.

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