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22 August 2019 | Story Eugene Seegers
Simonè Nel (Read More)
“When looking at the simply amazing female leadership emerging at the UFS — academic as well as administrative — I see hope and growth,” says Simoné Nel, a member of the management team on the South Campus.

Simoné Nel heads up the Support Services division on the UFS South Campus. Despite challenges during her youth, she learnt the power of strong examples to look up to, and still lives by the mantra she learnt in primary school from her Drum Majorettes coach. She believes that inspiration can come from mundane sources, day-to-day conversations, or even her children; she is the mother of a 10-year-old son and a 7-year-old daughter. In fact, her best example of teamwork comes from her experiences as mother: “Just watch what happens when a mother is calling frantically for her child if he slips from her grip; EVERYONE helps to find him!”

Tell us about your childhood: What are some of the lessons you learned early on? 

Growing up in the Western Cape, I had a primary school teacher and coach who taught me the value of the saying: “It is not the hours you put in, but what you put into the hours.” I still live by this; trying to make the most of every hour. Both of my parents passed away at a fairly young age, which made this just so much more true. USE your given time and LIVE as much as possible! Take joy in as many experiences as possible – even if it is a seemingly negative experience.

What inspires you?

Intelligent conversations, great music, my daughter’s energy, family time, and compassion in action. Simoné says her definition of compassion in action is: People like the rest of us with full-time jobs, dedicating every little spare time to helping women/children/families in need or distress; friends involved with finding forever homes for abandoned pets; the regular guy in the street helping a child stand up after falling from the curb.

How do you envision the UFS of the future — especially with regard to women's issues? 

When looking at the simply amazing female leadership emerging at the UFS – academic as well as administrative — I see hope and growth. Just page through the latest issue of Dumela or browse our UFS website: These are strong women; not afraid of embracing who they are and with a need to rise up. I am part of an all-girls team at the South Campus (coincidentally!) and we support each other in every possible way. Whether I know them as Prof, Doc, Ma’am, Mom, Sister, Vriendin – they are all Wonder Women to me.

Tell us something no-one (or only a few people) know about you?

I am in love with (a very broad scope of) music, from Beethoven on full volume to some serious rock. Yes, I sing along to my heart’s content. I am also from Scottish decent and admire my cousins in full costume (kilt and all!).

What does ‘success’ mean to you?

My definition of success has certainly taken a 180-degree turn. When I was still a young student, I longed for academic success and to pursue my PhD studies as soon as possible. Now I am a mom and wife — first and foremost — and still working on my master’s degree. At the end of a fruitful day at the office, a glass of wine with my husband, and hugs, kisses, and laughs from my children, I’d say I had a most successful day.

What ‘words of wisdom’ do you always fall back on? 

I learnt this early on, but had it confirmed in JRR Tolkien’s The Fellowship of the Ring: There is always HOPE.

Lastly, my mom taught me this gem: ‘A little kindness goes a long way.’

News Archive

But do you forgive yourself, Eugene de Kock? asks Candice Mama
2015-03-16

From the left are: Prof Pumla Gobodo-Madikizela, Candice Mama and Prof André Keet, Director of the UFS Institute for Reconciliation and Social Justice.
Photo: O'Ryan Heideman

 

Candice Mama: Audio

Candice Mama and her family met with her father’s assassin. Eugene de Kock. Prime Evil. Commander of the apartheid government’s covert Vlakplaas police unit. And what followed from this meeting was one of our country’s most poignant gestures of reconciliation. One by one, each family member expressed their forgiveness of De Kock, and soon afterwards, he was granted parole.

Candice recently visited the Bloemfontein Campus to talk about ‘An Unexpected Encounter with Eugene de Kock: A Journey of Transformation’. The event was a collaborative effort between the Institute for Reconciliation and Social Justice and Trauma, Forgiveness, and Reconciliation Studies.

“What makes it possible to cross the boundary from loss and pain to bond with the person who hurt you?” Prof Pumla Gobodo-Madikizela, asked Candice. “I had to educate myself about the when, where, and how, to get a context for Eugene de Kock,” she answered. With the encouragement of her mother, Candice became an avid reader from an early age. She devoured information, so that she could build a picture of this man within a specific historical and political context. What also contributed to this moment of reconciliation for her was De Kock humbling himself and taking full responsibility for his actions.

This meeting was not without inner conflict for Candice, though. “Why am I crying for hím?” she asked herself as she listened to him speak. “Why am I laughing?” she chastised herself as De Kock preened shyly for a group photograph with the family. “Is there something wrong with me to connect with him?” She questioned her values and beliefs. But instead of a monster, Candice saw the true essence of a repentant human being.

But how do you know he didn’t fake it, many people asked. Because it was “one of the most sincere and honest encounters I’ve experienced,” she said. During their meeting, Candice saw a man “crushed by the world”. Everything he believed as a young man, he realised, was a lie.

“Do you forgive yourself?” Candice asked the one question De Kock feared most. And in that moment, he was humanised for her. “When you’ve done the things I’ve done,” De Kock replied, “how do you forgive yourself?”
It remains an open question. But this act of forgiveness gives an entire country hope.

 

For more information or enquiries contact news@ufs.ac.za.

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