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Toxic masculinity under the spotlight at UFS Men’s Breakfast

25 November 2019 | Story Valentino Ndaba | Photo Igno van Niekerk

Two days before International Men’s Day Rees Mann addressed Kovsies about their responsibility to fight against abuse and rape.

“Half-a-million men commit suicide every year across the world. Men in South Africa are four times more likely to commit suicide than women but we are not talking about it. We try to forget that it exists because we want to assume the role of what society says masculinity should be.”

Rees Mann, ambassador at the South African Male Survivor of Sexual Abuse (SAMSOSA), made this shocking yet true statement at the first-ever Men’s Breakfast hosted by the University of the Free State (UFS) on 17 November 2019. Mann shared his story of surviving rape and abuse with 140 other men on the Bloemfontein Campus.

The Breakfast took place just days before the 16 Days of Activism for No Violence against Women and Children, a time when the nation will be on a drive to further awareness efforts around the issue.

Redefining masculinity and defying toxic masculinity

As a sexual assault survivor, Mann demonstrated what it looks like to lead by example in breaking the silence. “I still suffer from the consequences of being abused and raped. I have semi-facial dystonia, posttraumatic stress disorder, bipolar and Adult Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder but I manage each one of these issues. I am stronger than any other male who suffers in silence instead of seeing a psychologist.”

“The sad reality is that when a male commits suicide everybody around him says ‘I didn’t know he was so depressed’ because mental health issues for us males are considered a weakness,” said Mann.

Having walked the walk, Mann believes that seeking help is a sign of strength. “It is time for us men to take a stand and define our own masculinity,” he added.

Ending a vicious cycle

Mann pleaded with Kovsie men to join in the fight against the cycle of violence in South Africa. His fear is that if men do not heal themselves and introspect, the cycle of violence and gender-based violence will continue in this country. “Hurt people hurt people. Toxic masculinity kills not only me but women and children too.”

While debunking the myth surrounding rape victims always transforming into rapists, he acknowledged there is a percentage of males who were raped and abused who go on to become rapists and abusers. However, there are also perpetrators who were never sexually assaulted. The onus, according to Mann, is on all males to fight against these crimes to prevent history from repeating itself, in turn making South Africa a safer space for all who live in it.

Why these conversations are critical

Lemena Thebe, a senior officer at Student Academic Services who attended the Men’s Breakfast, was of the view that dialogue is an essential part of the process in the fight against rape, abuse and violence.

“I realised that we as men need to speak out about our challenges. Whether we were victims as boys or suffered any type of abuse as adults, we don’t have to be ashamed,” said Thebe.

News Archive

Full week of graduation ceremonies at UFS in April

2015-04-10

Autumn always sees the UFS’s first graduation ceremony of the year on the Bloemfontein Campus.

From 14 – 17 April 2015, graduates will once again be rewarded for their hard work while top speakers will address them in the Callie Human Centre. There will be a ceremony at 09:00 and at 14:30 each day on all four days of the graduation.

The programme for the 2015 April Graduation is as follows:

Tuesday 14 April 2015:

Professor Himla Soodyall will be the speaker at both ceremonies on this day. Prof Soodyall is a Medical Scientist for the South African Institute for Medical Research. She is also a Principal Medical Scientist for the National Health Laboratory Service, and a Director for the Human Genome Diversity and Disease Research Unit at the University of Witwatersrand.

During the first ceremony of the day at 09:00, all diplomas/certificates and B degrees in the Faculty of Natural and Agricultural Sciences will be awarded. Only Honours degrees in the Faculty of Natural and Agricultural Sciences will be awarded at the 14:30 ceremony.

Wednesday 15 April 2015:

Wednesday will see Ndumiso Hadebe take the stage to address graduates at both ceremonies.

At the age of 23, Hadebe is the Founder and Managing Director of Master Frontiers Consulting, a firm that capacitates leaders and managers to achieve business goals through their people. He worked previously as a Researcher at Shanduka Black Umbrellas, a flagship enterprise and supplier development programme of the Shanduka Foundation.

He has been received numerous awards for excellence in leadership, such as the Sedibeng District Municipal Mayor’s Award for Service and Leadership. He is a Brand South Africa Ambassador and Read Educational Trust Ambassador.

All diplomas/certificates, B and Honours degrees in the Faculty of Economic and Management Sciences, except B Com degrees, will be awarded during the morning ceremony at 09:00. Later, at the 14:30 ceremony, only B Com degrees in the Faculty of Economic and Management Sciences will be awarded.

Thursday 16 April 2015:

Multiple award winning South African TV presenter, Leanne Manas, will be the speaker at both Thursday ceremonies.

Manas has graced our screens for over a decade. Not many broadcasters can boast having had live TV experience, 5 days a week for 12 years. She is currently the anchor of SABC 2’s flagship breakfast programme, Morning Live. Leanne is a qualified Speech and Drama teacher. having studied at London Trinity College. She also has an Honours degree in English.
Diplomas/certificates up to and including Honours degrees in the Faculty of the Humanities, Social Sciences, and Communication Sciences will be awarded during the ceremony at 09:00. The 14:30 ceremony will have diplomas/certificates up to and including Honours degrees in the Faculty of the Humanities’ other qualifications except for Social Sciences and Communication Sciences.

Friday 17 April 2015:

Dr Maria Phalime will be the speaker at both ceremonies on Friday.

Phalime is a medical doctor and award-winning author. She practiced for a brief period as a general practitioner in South Africa and the United Kingdom, before leaving medical practice to pursue non-clinical interests. She has worked in trade and investment promotion, and has undertaken research and consulting in the areas of economic development and business facilitation.

Diplomas/certificates up to and including Honours degrees in the Faculty of Education (CE, NPDE and ACE excluded) will be awarded during the ceremony at 09:00. Diplomas/certificates up to and including Honours degrees in the Faculties of Health Sciences, Law, and Theology will be awarded at the 14:30 ceremony.

Click here for the simple layout of the 2015 April Graduation programme:
http://www.ufs.ac.za/adhoc-pages/2014-graduation-ceremony/graduation-ceremony

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