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12 October 2020 | Story Xolisa Mnukwa | Photo Supplied
Your kindness is contagious
Counselling psychologist at the university, Nhlori Ngobeni, believes that what you give to others does not necessarily leave your life; it comes back to you in some way or another, for the benefit of your health and well-being.

The month of October has been declared Mental Health Awareness Month, with the objective of not only educating the public about mental health, but also to reduce the stigma and discrimination to which people with mental illness are often subjected.

The COVID-19 global pandemic and the subsequent implementation of the lockdown have had an impact on all aspects of our lives: family, relationships, the economy, educational institutions, health system, to name a few.

As stipulated by the South African Department of Health and the South African Federation for Mental Health, mental-health problems come as the result of a complex interplay between biological, psychological, social, and environmental factors.

With that being said, University of the Free State (UFS) counselling psychologist and writer of the article Ubuntu, Nhlori Ngobeni, explains that the demands of our changing world can become quite overwhelming, leaving one feeling burdened by all the changes they need to make. She reflected on the increased challenges that students have experienced in their academics, physical and mental health, finances, and interpersonal relationships as a result of the pandemic, and how the spirit of Ubuntu can act as a catalyst of support.

Nelson Mandela defined Ubuntu as “the profound sense that we are human only through the humanity of others; that if we are to accomplish anything in this world, it will in equal measure be due to the work and achievement of others”.

Exercising your humanity through actions, words, gestures,
and thoughts can aid the sustenance of humanity.


Benefits of Ubuntu

Ngobeni further elaborated that living out your humanity should not be done to get something in return. She explained the essence and benefits of Ubuntu as the belief that being kind to others is like planting a seed and watering it daily. “It is guaranteed to yield some fruits. What you give to others does not necessarily leave your life; it comes back to you in some way or another, for the benefit of your health and well-being,” she added.

Ubuntu in action
Exercising your humanity through actions, words, gestures, and thoughts can aid the sustenance of humanity.

Here are some ways you can live out your humanity:

Live out your values: showing love; caring for and respecting others; choosing to forgive; having sympathy and empathy; being kind and compassionate.
Acts of service: spending time with others; sharing your knowledge; running an errand for the elderly; making a cup of tea for your parents or organising a movie or games night for your family.
Giving: food, clothes, time, or money.
• Being intentional: being genuine and present in your everyday experiences or encounters. Calling a classmate or friend and checking on them.
• Gestures: greeting, nodding, smiling, waving, etc. … simply acknowledging others.

Visit the Kovsie Life Well-being Warriors page for important telephone numbers and online resources offered by the UFS Department of Student Counselling and Development.

News Archive

Prof Antjie Krog speaks on verbalising revulsion and the collusion of men
2015-06-26

From the left are Prof Lucius Botes, UFS: Dean of the Faculty of the Humanities; Prof Helene Strauss, UFS: Department of English; Prof Pumla Gobodo-Madikizela, UFS: Trauma, Forgiveness and Reconciliation Studies; Prof Antjie Krog, UCT: Department Afrikaans and Dutch; Dr Buhle Zuma, UCT: Department of Psychology. Both Prof Strauss and Dr Zuma are partners in the Mellon Foundation research project.

“This is one of the bitterest moments I have ever endured. I would rather see my daughter carried away as a corpse than see her raped like this.”

This is one of 32 testimonies that were locked away quietly in 1902. These documents, part of the NC Havenga collection, contain the testimonies of Afrikaner women describing their experiences of sexual assault and rape at the hands of British soldiers during the South African War.

This cluster of affidavits formed the foundation of a public lecture that Prof Antjie Krog delivered at the University of the Free State’s (UFS) Bloemfontein Campus on Tuesday 23 June 2015. The lecture, entitled ‘They Couldn’t Achieve their Goal with Me: Narrating Rape during the South African War’, was the third instalment in the Vice-Chancellor’s Lecture Series on Trauma, Memory, and Representations of the Past. The series is hosted by Prof Pumla Gobodo-Madikizela, Senior Research Professor in Trauma, Forgiveness, and Reconciliation Studies at the UFS, as part of a five-year research project funded by the Andrew W. Mellon Foundation.

Verbalising revulsion

The testimonies were taken down during the last two months of the war, and “some of the women still had marks and bruises on their bodies as evidence,” Prof Krog said. The victims’ words, on the other hand, struggled to express the story their bodies told.

What are the nouns for that which one sees? What words are permissible in front of men? How does one process revulsion verbally? These are the barriers the victims – raised with Victorian reserve – faced while trying to express their trauma, Prof Krog explained.

The collusion of men

When the war ended, there was a massive drive to reconcile the Boers and the British. “Within this process of letting bygones be bygones,” Prof Krog said, “affidavits of severe violations by white men had no place. Through the collusion of men, prioritising reconciliation between two white male hierarchies, these affidavits were shelved, and, finally, had to suffer an embargo.”

“It is only when South Africa accepted a constitution based on equality and safety from violence,” Prof Krog said, “that the various levels of deeply-rooted brutality, violence, and devastation of men against the vulnerable in society seemed to burst like an evil boil into the open, leaving South African aghast in its toxic suppurations. As if, for many decades, we did not know it was there and multiplied.”

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