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He’s just not man enough: The social expectation of masculinity

19 November 2021 | Story Nontombi Velelo | Photo Supplied

Nontombi Velelo copy — Nontombi Velelo is a PhD candidate and Lecturer in the Department of Sociology at the University of the Free State (UFS).

Current reports related to gender reflect and emphasise the negative impact of gender on society — especially the negative impact of men and masculinity in society. Studies are conducted to understand the root(s) and triggers of men’s social conduct/misconduct. Without a doubt, men are often guilty of causing some of the social ills. However, we often do not acknowledge and recognise the pressures and challenges that society presents to men. In most instances, the focus in reporting is on their conduct/misconduct. Less attention is given to interrogating and reflecting on how masculine notions are formed and subsequently practised, and the influence of social settings on these processes.

It is worth pointing out that masculinity is not a static entity – it is flexible, evolving, and adapts to different contexts. However, there is a struggle between upholding the traditional practices of masculinity and the desire for modern and liberal practices of masculinity. The concept of ‘traditional’ masculinity is frequently used when investigating the construction and practices of masculinity. This concept is often understood as the opposite of the modern representation of masculinity. Yet, it refers to what is considered to make a man a ‘real’ man – attributes such as independence, self-sufficiency, heterosexuality, physical toughness, and emotional restrictedness. These attributes highlight the ideas of masculinity embedded in traditional ideology, rules, and norms. We often expect men to possess these attributes, particularly independence, self-sufficiency, and emotional restrictedness. Without a doubt, these expectations present challenges for men. Men are less likely to express their feelings – they are also not expected to express their emotions. Besides, men are not as expressive as women and the signs of mental illness are not the same as those in women. Though we expect men to man-up and demonstrate strength when confronted with challenges, we are not aware of the damage this may cause to their mental and emotional well-being. According to the World Health Organisation (2021), South African men are more than four times more likely to commit suicide than women. Of more than 6 000 cases of suicide, 5 138 were men, which translates to 21,8 per 100 000. This indicates the need to unlearn the damaging expectations of gender.

Men’s socio-economic and socio-political positions influence how they view and practise their masculinity. Though Statistics South Africa (2021) reported that 32,4% of men are unemployed (compared to 36,8% of unemployed women), South African men living in poverty find themselves in a stressful climate, as they are unable to live up to their and others’ ideas of ‘successful masculinity’. To a large extent, men are still expected to assume the role of financial provider. Failure to adhere to these expectations may result in one’s masculine traits not being recognised or acknowledged. In some cases, men are considered ‘less of a man’ since they cannot fulfil the expectation of financial provision. This, subsequently, affects their interaction and relationships with other men, women, and children.

Apart from the societal expectations, we need to pay attention to the socialisation process within the family. A family is a training ground where members are trained and taught about desirable and undesirable behaviour and expectations of others. Within the family structure, men and women are socialised to internalise and accept toxic gender roles – one being the use of violence. Violent behaviour is often associated with normal ‘boyish’ behaviour; therefore, it is perceived to be expected of a boy child to resort to violence. It is expected of a boy child to retaliate/fight back when facing conflict. Consequently, violence is viewed as a measure to correct behaviour associated with disobedience or challenging masculine authority. The Mail & Guardian reported in 2020 that one in five women in South Africa experienced violence at a partner’s hands. South Africa has witnessed an increase in gang rapes, most of the first-time rape offenders being teenage boys (SafeSpace, 2021). Teenage boys are not only members of society but also members of the family. This does not imply that parents are responsible for the acts of their children. However, it demonstrates the need to interrogate and challenge the socialisation process as far as gender roles and expectations are concerned. Regardless of the mentioned challenges associated with masculinity, there are individual men in society who have invested efforts to transform the masculine scripts and to cultivate positive male attributes. These are men who strive to be good citizens, husbands, fathers, brothers, and uncles. Unfortunately, the efforts invested by these individual men tend to be disregarded in society, since the focus is always on unpacking and reflecting the toxic actions and attributes of men.

Commemoration of International Men’s Day

International Men’s Day commemorates the positive contribution of men to their world, families, and communities. The day aims to create awareness around the well-being of men. As we celebrate this day, it is important to recognise and acknowledge male pain. Society often disregards male pain and focuses on male privilege.

Furthermore, recognising ways in which men are hurt by rigid gender roles and expectations and social settings where these roles and expectations are practised, does not imply disregard for the struggle and oppression of women. With the 2021 slogan being ‘Better relations between men and women’, I am reminded of the third wave of feminist scholars who pointed out that society is experiencing a crisis embedded in patriarchal masculinity rather than masculinity itself. There is a need to sensitise men and women to the dangers of patriarchy, particularly for men. It is also important to encourage men to construct their own identities that are different from those prescribed by patriarchy. Although most men might not be oppressed by sexism in ways similar to women, we need to pay much closer attention to how men suffer the consequences of sexism. It is worth recognising that men do not derive the common benefits from sexist oppression, since they do not hold a common social position. It is important to acknowledge the role of individual men in changing the masculine narrative. May we recognise such individuals in our homes, workplaces, and communities. There is a need to unlearn the damaging patriarchal expectations of gender.

News Archive

UFS keeps the power on

2015-06-24

At a recent Emergency Power Indaba held on the Bloemfontein Campus, support structures at the university met to discuss the Business Continuity Intervention Plan to manage load shedding on the three campuses of the UFS.

Currently, 35 generators serving 55 of the buildings have already been installed as a back-up power supply on the three campuses of the university. According to Anton Calitz, Electrical Engineer at the UFS, the running cost to produce a kWh of electricity with a diesel generator amounts to approximately three times the cost at which the UFS buys electricity from Centlec.

Planned additional generators will attract in excess of R4 million in operating costs per year. For 2015, the UFS senior leadership approved R11 million, spread over the three campuses. Remaining requirements will be spread out over the next three years. University Estates is also looking at renewable energy sources.

On the Bloemfontein Campus, 26 generators serving forty-one buildings are in operation. On South Campus, two generators were installed at the new Education Building and at the ICT Server Room. Lecture halls, the Arena, the Administration Building, and the library will be added later in 2015. Eight generators serving 12 buildings are in operation on the Qwaqwa Campus. In 2015, the Humanities Building, Lecture Halls and the heat pump room will also be equipped with generators.

Most buildings will be supplied only with partial emergency power. In rare cases, entire buildings will be supplied because the cost of connecting is lower than re-wiring for partial demand. According to Nico Janse van Rensburg, Senior Director at University Estates, emergency power will be limited to lighting and power points only. No allowances will be made for air-conditioning.

“Most area lighting will also be connected to emergency power,” he said.

Where spare capacity is available on existing emergency power generators, requests received for additional connections will be added, where possible, within the guidelines. The following spaces will receive preference:
- Lecture halls with the lights, data projectors, and computers running
- Laboratories for practical academic work and sensitive research projects
- Academic research equipment that is sensitive to interruptions
- Buildings hosting regular events

According to Janse van Rensburg, all further needs will be investigated. Staff can forward all emergency power supply needs to Anton Calitz at calitzja@ufs.ac.za

Staff and students can also manage load shedding in the following ways:

1. Carry a small torch with you at all times, in case you are on a stairwell or other dark area when the lights go out. You can also use the flashlight app on your phone. Download it before any load shedding occurs. This can come in handy if the lights go out suddenly, and you cannot find a flashlight. Load-shedding after dark imposes even more pressure on our Campus Security staff. We can assist them with our vigilance and preparedness by carrying portable lights with us at all times and by assisting colleagues.
2. Candles pose a serious safety risk. Rather use battery- or solar-powered lights during load shedding.
3. Ensure that your vehicle always has fuel in the tank, because petrol stations cannot pump fuel during power outages.
4. Ensure that you have enough cash, because ATMs cannot operate without electricity.
5. The UFS Sasol Library has study venues available which students can use during load shedding.
6. When arranging events which are highly dependent on power supply, especially at night, organisers should consult the load-shedding schedule before determining dates and preferably also make back-up arrangements. If generators are a necessity, the financial impact should be taken into consideration.

The senior leadership also approved a list of buildings to be equipped with emergency power supplies.

More about load shedding at the UFS:
Getting out of the dark
More information, guidelines and contact information

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