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31 May 2022 | Story Lunga Luthuli | Photo Supplied
Melissa De Aveiro

Singer, writer, and motivational speaker, Melissa de Aveiro, says: “One can only rise from the ashes when the fire starts again, and the beauty of it all is that the ashes is stuck to your clothes. As you move on, you build off it as it falls from your clothes.”

She said: “When the fire starts in you, nothing is going to stop it.”

This she said at the Division of Organisational Development and Employee Well-being’s Rising from the Ashes event held at the Centenary Complex on the Bloemfontein Campus. Melissa’s story is about never giving up and “never backing down – even when people throw you with rocks, use the rocks to build a new road”.

Melissa said: “Many people unfortunately do not rise from the ashes because there is no support from friends, people. You can never do it alone as the journey through the ashes is lonely.”

Melissa believes to get through the ashes, one has to go back and “remind yourself of when it was good in your life, remind yourself about the positive things – even though things might not be great now”.

Known as the 'Weskus Dutchess', and growing up in Vredendal, Western Cape, Melissa’s tough life, sexual abuse, drug abuse, homelessness, and the death of her son never stopped her from dreaming. All the setbacks planted in her a “passion for a guitar and people, a birth of a new season, a desire to change the world”.

To rise from the ashes, Melissa said, “You need to go back to the place where you were hurting, confront the demons, the people that abused you, maybe forgive them and remove the chains you are tied with.”

Susan van Jaarsveld, Senior Director: Human Resources at the University of the Free State, believes that hosting wellness events is a way for the UFS to show that “employees are the most valuable asset of the university and need to be looked after”.

Susan said: “Staff need to know that it is okay not to be okay. However, the UFS has systems to look after your well-being. People need to know that they are not alone, they can make use of the Department of Human Resources’ Careways Employee Wellness Programme.”

Susan believes it was important to host the event, as “staff need face-to-face interaction for their well-being, it helps people to know they are not alone”.

Melissa, the author of the book Weskus Wonderwerk, believes in being unstoppable. She said: “To rise from the trenches, always think positive about yourself, you must exist. You cannot give up; your worth cannot be determined by an individual.” 

News Archive

Gendered violence and women’s citizenship in Africa
2014-05-23

 
Prof Takyiwaa Manuh

Prof Takyiwaa Manuh celebrated both Africa Day and her birthday with the UFS on 22 May 2014.

Being the guest speaker at the Africa Day Memorial Lecture, Prof Manuh discussed how gendered violence and the lack of women’s true citizenship in Africa still hinder the Pan-African ideal. She asked the question: if African issues get less worldwide attention, how much less attention do African women get?

“Africa Day offers us an opportunity to revisit the Pan-African ideal and aspiration for total national liberation, equality and self-worth,” Prof Manuh said.

“This ideal has envisaged full citizenship with the enjoyment of rights and resources for the people of Africa to live a dignified and fulfilling life. Yet, the conceptions of citizenship that have emerged in several African countries do not fully incorporate women and girls.”

The lecture explored the policing of women’s bodies and sexualities and how their enjoyment of rights is undermined – often under the pretext of culture. Often families, communities, states, religious bodies and culture work collaboratively to mold African women into the patriarchal image of disciplined and virtuous. The epidemic of violence against females negates their fundamental human rights and their claim to full citizenship and protection within their states.

The lecture also reviewed recent efforts including law reform, legislation and actions by activists. “The African Union and the UN need to confront these violations and suggest a robust agenda for more effective exercise of women’s citizenship rights and convergence towards the Pan-African ideal.”

Prof Manuh is currently Director: Social Development Policy Division of the United Nations Economic Commission for Africa in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia.

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