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31 May 2022 | Story Lunga Luthuli | Photo Supplied
Melissa De Aveiro

Singer, writer, and motivational speaker, Melissa de Aveiro, says: “One can only rise from the ashes when the fire starts again, and the beauty of it all is that the ashes is stuck to your clothes. As you move on, you build off it as it falls from your clothes.”

She said: “When the fire starts in you, nothing is going to stop it.”

This she said at the Division of Organisational Development and Employee Well-being’s Rising from the Ashes event held at the Centenary Complex on the Bloemfontein Campus. Melissa’s story is about never giving up and “never backing down – even when people throw you with rocks, use the rocks to build a new road”.

Melissa said: “Many people unfortunately do not rise from the ashes because there is no support from friends, people. You can never do it alone as the journey through the ashes is lonely.”

Melissa believes to get through the ashes, one has to go back and “remind yourself of when it was good in your life, remind yourself about the positive things – even though things might not be great now”.

Known as the 'Weskus Dutchess', and growing up in Vredendal, Western Cape, Melissa’s tough life, sexual abuse, drug abuse, homelessness, and the death of her son never stopped her from dreaming. All the setbacks planted in her a “passion for a guitar and people, a birth of a new season, a desire to change the world”.

To rise from the ashes, Melissa said, “You need to go back to the place where you were hurting, confront the demons, the people that abused you, maybe forgive them and remove the chains you are tied with.”

Susan van Jaarsveld, Senior Director: Human Resources at the University of the Free State, believes that hosting wellness events is a way for the UFS to show that “employees are the most valuable asset of the university and need to be looked after”.

Susan said: “Staff need to know that it is okay not to be okay. However, the UFS has systems to look after your well-being. People need to know that they are not alone, they can make use of the Department of Human Resources’ Careways Employee Wellness Programme.”

Susan believes it was important to host the event, as “staff need face-to-face interaction for their well-being, it helps people to know they are not alone”.

Melissa, the author of the book Weskus Wonderwerk, believes in being unstoppable. She said: “To rise from the trenches, always think positive about yourself, you must exist. You cannot give up; your worth cannot be determined by an individual.” 

News Archive

Researchers explore gender-based violence at schools in Southern Africa
2014-10-17

Prof Dennis Francis
Photo: René-Jean van der Berg


Violence in schools, especially gender violence, has been a much explored and debated topic. But researchers at the University of the Free State (UFS) are now also exploring the link between gender, diversity and violence in schools in Southern Africa.

This study – a first of its kind – received funding from the United Nations Educational, Scientific and Cultural Organisation (UNESCO) and will investigate how the perception of ‘different’ is a contributing factor to violence in schools.

This UNESCO-funded study, in collaboration with Hivos, GALA and the Government of the Netherlands, will involve schools in Botswana, Lesotho, Namibia and Swaziland.

Prof Dennis Francis, UFS Dean of Education and principal researcher in this study, says children and youth around the world are exposed to violence in and around educational settings. “This does not only undermine a child’s rights to quality education, but also the capacity of the education sector to train future citizens who will respect each other regardless of differences.”

Prof Francis says although girls are the most vulnerable targets of GBV, boys can also be targets, as evidence reveals that many children and youths who are perceived as different in terms of gender, are often victims of violence in school.

“Education is the most significant means of fostering social inclusion, promoting individual rights and realising the full potential of all young people, including those perceived as different. This project is aimed at assisting government, policy makers and professionals in the education sector, as well as civil society organisations and other key stakeholders in Southern Africa to create educational policies and practices that promote safe schools for all youths.”


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