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Melissa de Aveiro inspires UFS with journey about rising from the ashes

31 May 2022 | Story Lunga Luthuli | Photo Supplied

Singer, writer, and motivational speaker, Melissa de Aveiro, says: “One can only rise from the ashes when the fire starts again, and the beauty of it all is that the ashes is stuck to your clothes. As you move on, you build off it as it falls from your clothes.”

She said: “When the fire starts in you, nothing is going to stop it.”

This she said at the Division of Organisational Development and Employee Well-being’s Rising from the Ashes event held at the Centenary Complex on the Bloemfontein Campus. Melissa’s story is about never giving up and “never backing down – even when people throw you with rocks, use the rocks to build a new road”.

Melissa said: “Many people unfortunately do not rise from the ashes because there is no support from friends, people. You can never do it alone as the journey through the ashes is lonely.”

Melissa believes to get through the ashes, one has to go back and “remind yourself of when it was good in your life, remind yourself about the positive things – even though things might not be great now”.

Known as the 'Weskus Dutchess', and growing up in Vredendal, Western Cape, Melissa’s tough life, sexual abuse, drug abuse, homelessness, and the death of her son never stopped her from dreaming. All the setbacks planted in her a “passion for a guitar and people, a birth of a new season, a desire to change the world”.

To rise from the ashes, Melissa said, “You need to go back to the place where you were hurting, confront the demons, the people that abused you, maybe forgive them and remove the chains you are tied with.”

Susan van Jaarsveld, Senior Director: Human Resources at the University of the Free State, believes that hosting wellness events is a way for the UFS to show that “employees are the most valuable asset of the university and need to be looked after”.

Susan said: “Staff need to know that it is okay not to be okay. However, the UFS has systems to look after your well-being. People need to know that they are not alone, they can make use of the Department of Human Resources’ Careways Employee Wellness Programme.”

Susan believes it was important to host the event, as “staff need face-to-face interaction for their well-being, it helps people to know they are not alone”.

Melissa, the author of the book Weskus Wonderwerk, believes in being unstoppable. She said: “To rise from the trenches, always think positive about yourself, you must exist. You cannot give up; your worth cannot be determined by an individual.”

News Archive

UFS attracts excellent and diverse students

2015-08-20

Matshediso Mokoena and Thato Monkoe.
Photo: Thabo Kessah

When Thato Monkoe and Matshediso Mokoena sat for their final matric examinations in 2014, all they had on their minds was not just passing, but passing well. Little did they know at that time that passing well would place so much responsibility on their shoulders.

Both Thato and Matshediso come from rural and disadvantaged backgrounds. They are first-year students at the Qwaqwa Campus of the University of the Free State, and are the first in their respective families to study at a university.

Thato describes his situation as “sad and good at the same time”.

“It is good, because I am the first one at home to have completed my matric and to have gone on to study at a tertiary institution. At the same time, it is sad as I feel sorry for my siblings who, for various reasons, did not have similar opportunities when they opted out of school”, said Thato, a BEd student.

”Now my sister and brother, as well as the entire family, perceive me as the one with brains, and this makes me uncomfortable. However, I am up for the challenge to be the first one to graduate with a degree in my family”.

Matshediso Mokoena, a BSc student, who obtained distinctions in Mathematics, Physical Sciences, and Life Sciences last year, concurs with Thato.

”As much as my family is supportive, there is always pressure as they expect the best from me,” she said.

“The pressure does not only come from my family. My entire community looks up to me, and they can’t stop talking about my achievements”, Matshediso revealed.

Both Thato and Matshediso are, however, happy that the dark cloud of doubt about academic achievement in their families has finally disappeared.

“At least someone in my family is hard at work carving her future, and willing to set a good example. That person is me”, said Matshediso, who aspires to be a medical doctor, and has a younger sister in Grade 8.

Thato and Matshediso are just two of hundreds of students making good use of the University of the Free State’s commitment to attract excellent and diverse students at both undergraduate and postgraduate levels, as reflected in the Strategic Plan 2015-2020.

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